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Alan Jackson & Jeff Foxworthy Miscellaneous Redneck Games (1995) Greetings y’all and welcome all you danged foreigners from other nations Dear lord be with our guests and prepare them for the butt whopping they are about to receive. The Olympics in Georgia, god you know we’re gonna screw that up. I guarantee you when they let those doves go at the opening ceremony there are gonna be guys in the parking lot with shotguns. And we will not have a flame that big without a pig on it, I guarantee it. Some fat guy going, “Danged good barbeque top of them stairs up there. They ain’t got no hand rail be careful. Of all the games that the rednecks play, there’s some crazy events If you know about the redneck ways, then it makes perfect sense Hell the Olympic rings will be five old tires nailed together. See that’s my fear they’re gonna get the list of events they gonna have no idea what half this stuff is suppose to be. Like for fencing, they’ll be giving people bailing wire and sheet metal. There probably have to cancel water polo after the first two or three horses drown. I tell you instead of discus throwing they’ll be flinging Ford hubcaps. You can’t blame them for the way they are but you can sit back and grin Cause they’ll do something that’s so bizarre you’ll want to see it again If you could ever get into their minds there’s no telling what you might find They just do things in a different way all the games that the rednecks play And you know they haven’t even thought about it but the river they’re having the kayak races on is the same river they filmed Deliverance at. That ought to add a whole degree of difficulty shouldn’t it. Cause if Ned Batty couldn’t make it down that thing a French man in a pair of biker pants ain’t got a chance. Be prepared to watch the wildest show making her out in the line You might not see them bringing home the gold nut they’ll sure make mama proud If you could ever get into their minds there’s no telling what you might find They just do things in a different way all the games that the rednecks play Hey Ed, I got a white one |
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