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The Statler Brothers Miscellaneous How To Be A Country Star (1979) Theres questions were always hearing every where we go Like how do I cut a record or get on a country show Well it takes more than just ambition and three chords on an old guitar Theres a few more thing you ought to learn to be a country star You have to learn to sing like Waylon or pick like Jerry Reed Yodel like Jeannie Shepard write songs like Tom T Put a cry in your voice like Haggard learn Spanish like Johnny R Whisper like Bill Anderson and youll be a country star Play piano like Ronnie Milsap or Gilley or Jerry Lee Yo-yo like Roy Acuff or talk plain like Ralph Emery Growl like Conway Twitty get a red white and blue guitar Build a swimming pool like Webb did and youll be a country star Be tall like Sonny James is tell jokes like Minnie Pearl Be short like Jimmy Dickens or play five-string like Earl Get a hip band like Willie learn to stutter like M-Mel Get a cap like Roy Clark wore or a voice like Barbara Mandrell Be rich like Eddy Arnold say youre making more than you are Get a gimmick like Charley Pride got and youll be a country star But if you have no talent and youre not a male If youre built somewhat like Dolly or have a face like Crystal Gayle Come back stage and ask for Harold, Phil, Don or Lou And well see you auditioned for the Statler Brothers Review |
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