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Violent Femmes Freak Magnet A Story (Featuring Pierre Henry) I got a story A sad sad story About a girl Who met a boy About her mother Whose vision saw her Daughter to marry Another boy (Nooo nooo nooo...) They made a plan To get away To run away And though it be hard To make that day Freely to live Without the mother They'd send a postcard (Nooo nooo nooo...) Out on the interstate That's where they made their mistake That's where they met their fate Out on the interstate They met a monster The monster of the interstate Who will not hesitate Who eats teenagers Like a shark eats little fishes Who eats bad kids disobeying parents wishes An interloper against the elopers A troll at the pay toll They stopped at the toll booth And reached for a quarter The monster filled the whole booth He gave them no quarter "Don't eat me" Chirped the girl Clutching to her purse "Don't eat me" Croaked the boy "Or eat her first I'll turn right around And take her back to her mother's We repent of being out of wedlock lovers" "You should have thought of that before" And a scaly horny hand Ripped the car lock door And the boy Tried to drive But oh boy He was eaten alive And the girl Tried to scream But she was swirled In the giant's vanilla ice cream And the boy was yummy And the girl was yummy As they slid down the throat To the monster's yellow tummy He said: "Hmm hmm good Didn't do like they should Hmm hmm good Didn't do like they should" The mother sold the Rights to the story It was so scary This gory story They made a movie A horror movie The mother made a million And the producers made a billion "And that other sweet boy That my daughter has shunned Now I'm his wife and he's my husband" The moral of this story Is clear for all to see And if clearly all can see Then it isn't clear to me |
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